Suddenly it feels like hmm 10 years has passed and hmm its just 6 months has passed.
6 months of not having her beside me, nearly 4 months of not seeing her or getting any of her news, and i finally saw her again on the very special day – My Birthday.
Its pretty amazed that i could actually went down from orchard to fullerton hotel in like less then 3 mins after i hang up the call just to rush and see her on my birthday and suddenly i feels that there’s nothing more important for me to see her on my birthday as i guess that’s my birthday wish, so well i can said its a dream come true for me?
And for the next few days beautiful future just appear in my mind, my dream or even everything i sees i see future, only happy future.
i think its good for people who believe that love is worth one more try.
So couples out there who still love each other so much without any 3rd party intruding, please give it one more try because love is really an amazing thing that can creates wonders and miracle. But definitely it takes 2 hands to clap and both party got to work hard hand in hand to let the try become a success.
Always take note that a best gift from a girl to the guy its her trust she can give him and the best gift a guy could give a girl its the loyalty of his heart to her.
ALL COUPLES SHOULD MEMORIZE THIS HARD AND APPLY IT INTO THEIR LOVE LIFE.
Guess this 26th birthday and Xmas is really not a good period for me, first time in 3 years that my birthday is so empty and i guess it will be an empty xmas too for me.
But that won’t stop me from giving people small little gift because its a festive season to give unconditionally 🙂
Ending,
It’s quite awesome when people asked me everytime: Why you still using this lousy Blackberry? Especially when i turn on my 3G network and confirm guarantee the phone will dead and showed empty battery within 30mins of usage even the battery is fully charged. And now my phone is also charging beside me while i’m blogging because i turned on the 3G network.
And its hard to tell people that i dont want to change phone because there were this very beautiful girl who sent me a text on 12/5/2010 telling me to keep that message and thus since then i have being using this pathetic phone until now until i still dont feel like changing because the text message will be gone if i were to change to a new phone.
And that’s the reason why i still keep this phone and saved this message.
I still dont really feel like changing this phone away, this text message is super valuable to me.
1 more week to 2014, hope i have the time to come and bullshit my 2014 resolution.
We are not broken, just bent we can learn to love again.
I guess the sms sent has been too harsh, too nasty and too bad. I really wish i could apologize to you. I’m sorry to you.
I know that no matter how much of apology is also useless in any ways as i believe there’s really no more ways we could work things out again.
I feel that I shouldn’t tie you anymore to me since there were much more better guys than me appearing in your life. I had once promised you that i will surely walk down the life with you, but when there’s someone trying to walk into our life and door were opened for him, i will take my place and leave you so that you can be a happier girl being with the someone else.
7 years of awaiting, from the 2nd boyfriend i have always been waiting, waiting for miracle to come, i wait and wait for the 3rd one, i didn’t give up on you, i wait til the 4th one, i nearly gave up, you appear in my life again. I am the 5th and things weren’t always so well for us. we broke up we drifted away and we came back again, 2nd broke up we drifted out so much. I did wrongful things to you, i know i can never be forgiven but you still forgave me. I knew that i really had to work hard for the next 1 year to prove myself a good guy to you, holding on to the only hope that could bring us back together again. I know single means you can do whatever you want without any obligations, i understand your feelings that since not together there’s no why you shouldn’t hang out with different guys although some are just brothers or normal friends only, problem is you never know where’s the line of friends and crush.
On that very night, i asked you a very simple question, to leave with me or him, you choose him over me. At that very moment i can just feel my heart is dead, never did you ever will want to treat me this way, never did i expect you to tell me that answer. You told me you didn’t know what you want, you don’t even know you still love me, further on you showed me how enjoyable your life is when all other guys can satisfies your cravings, pamper you like a small little princess and treats you so much better and even know what you want to eat and drink more than I do, that’s when i knew that giving up the last hope is the only thing i can do for you.
I know that i am not a good guy either, always say you, assume you and scolded you. I delivered flowers to Vernette which caused a major upset to you. Yes I do get jealous easily but that’s purely I just too love you, I was scared to lose you. I worked so hard, do so much just to please you. I may do alot of stupid things to make you angry or make you dislike me. I may be poor and not as rich as your friends’ boyfriend. I may not be as handsome as the guy you always wanted, I am lacking the charisma and a nice fit body who you always wanted me to have. I may not be the ideal guy that you want, but all i always wanted to let you know is that no matter how negative i am, how ugly i am, how poor i am, how fat i am, I always and will only puts you as my priority and only prioritize you.
As much as i would like to express my heartfelt for you, I really hope you can go out and find your white knight who you will love as much as he loves you. I really wish you all the best in your future and I believe that a sweet, loving, caring, pretty girl will never be hard to find the ideal guy you always want, maybe that guy has already appeared in your life pampering you right now while i am sitting here thinking of you. Be it hate me or forgive me it’s no longer an important thing for me to know it anymore.
After the letter has been signed, everything will be back to 7 years ago when we were just really a strangers when we first met at the fish spa in Chinatown. I don’t see any hope or any chance that we could be together ever again because frankly speaking, my heart has really died on that friday night when you give me that answer, i really don’t know how to love a girl anymore. 2nd unsuccessful broken relationship for me, a painful lesson to me and there all my confidence lost again. I really don’t dare to fall in love anymore, the phobia will always be there for me.
there’s this saying:
相聚离开 都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽
Nothing last forever, be it together or separated.
I’m really sorry as a failure to be the perfect boyfriend you always wanted in me during this 3 years. And I’m sorry for all the wrongdoings i do to you to make you cry every time. I’m sure the next guy will only make you smile and be the perfect guy for you.
I wouldn’t say i love you this 3 words to you again, but i would like to say Thank You for giving so much good memories, all these will always stay and remained in my heart.
谢谢你 Miss J, 对不起 Miss J.
Stay a happy little cheerful girl because you are the sunshine to the guy who once loved you.
I don’t want to lose you
but I don’t want to use you
just to have somebody by my side. I don’t want to hate you,
I don’t want to take you
but I don’t want to be the one to cry.
And that don’t really matter to anyone anymore.
But like a fool I keep losing my place
and I keep seeing you walk through that door.
But there’s a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it’s sad when you know it’s your heart you can’t trust.
There’s a reason why people don’t stay where they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just aint enough.
Now, I could never change you
I don’t want to blame you.
Baby, you don’t have to take the fall.
Yes, I may have hurt you, but I did not desert you.
Maybe I just want to have it all.
It makes a sound like thunder
it makes me feel like rain.
And like a fool who will never see the truth,
I keep thinking something’s gonna change.
And there’s no way home
when it’s late at night and you’re all alone.
Are there things that you wanted to say?
And do you feel me beside you in your bed,
there beside you, where I used to lay?
And there’s a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it’s sad when you know it’s your heart they can’t touch.
There’s a reason why people don’t stay who they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain’t enough.
Today should be a happy and joyous day, but never do i expect it to be the worst day of my life. How worst could a day like today happened to me?
I really didn’t expect to hear this type of things so fast, as in i really have not prepared myself to see the best for her and the worst for me. Maybe it’s time to finally move on from where i have always stood there, standing there awaiting for her no matter what happens, but this time after i get to hear what i didn’t what to hear the most. I knew the answer was to let it go and to leave no matter what the future might be for it to be better or worst for her or perhaps for us.
3 years of waiting, 3 years of holding all come to an end today.
There’s nothing much else left to be said, there’s nothing much else has to be done. What can be done, i had already done it. What needs to be done, i also fulfilled it already.
After a 2 serious setback relationship, I don’t think i still have the courage to fall in love anymore.
I really hope the next girl i find in my life can just be a simple not complicated girl who knows the minimum in her heart that she loves me and she really loves me.
But after this time, do i still believe in true love and really can make myself to fall in love again?
I really hope she can find the guy she really fancy, Be with the guy she really loves and loves the guy as much as the guy loves her.
I have really done all what i can do for you, the rest of the things you want in a guy i hope the next guy can provide for you.
Off i go, to leave you, for the good for the both of us.
You will be the woman i love the most. Thanks for the lesson you gave me for the past 3 years and everything, every moment spent with you will always be the bitter sweet memories for me. 谢谢你。。
I guess i received back a well deserved punishment already, life is fair and i really had to accept my punishment and those heartbreaking incident that happened to me. Never did i feel so sad before.. never never.. my heart still sinks since last Friday when i was at the club, i had to tell myself everything is over when she choose someone who is not me to go back with. I knew that at that point everything has changed and things had ended without a trace.
Did my mistakes makes her changed so much so until she is no longer the same girl i knew? Or that’s her true self but had to cover up because she knew me? I’m puzzled..
Outside world are always so tempting, filled with temptations, the friends you hang out with, the accompany you received. If there’s no limit and there’s no a stop line to draw in between how far can we go and learn when need to show a ‘stop’ sign to the temptations out there, i believe everyone will be happier.
going 7 years of loving the same girl over and over again, it’s time to pack up all the broken pieces that was left behind and move on to another phase of life. I know that everything is impossible since that night, i knew that after what i witness i have to accept it because that was a karma and punishment for me. I don’t think i can love another person again as much as i do for you, i know that i won’t be able to spend the next 7 years again for someone who still don’t know what she wants. I will just go with my plan B.
On a side note, after working in UPS for nearly a year, I have finally got promoted to a Territory Account Manager which is quite a good position for me to advance my career in the future. Really thanks all the support i have and the knowledge i could learn from the old birds to guide me through, a new phase of work, a new stress beginning and a new level of workload i have to face. I will definitely work harder towards my career path and to get my fats off my body as quickly as possible so i can lose my weight. The only thing for me to pin hope on is on my career to be more successful and to lose more weight and be a fitter guy.
I really didn’t expect our story to end up in this saddening end.
To the only one: get to know what you really want and go achieve the thing that you really want and you cannot loss in your life. I really hope you can know what you want and decide for yourself fight for what you really want.
When you know you love someone so much, you became a fool for her.
When you knew that no matter how much you do, you still lose to someone else, than you should know that walking away is the only solution for both party.
I knew that i receive my karma already, in a bad bad way to hit me back on my face. Didn’t know that revenge and karma can be such a scary thing to me. I’m sorry for doing so much things to cause her unhappy before, i received back all the punishment already .
I know its time to move on and never look back at all the memories and pain anymore..
“You’ll still the one” will always be the music i love the most but it will also be the most painful song that i hear.
I really hope you will know what you want for your life and the guy you truly loves,
I knew i am never that lucky guy.
😦
Aside
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Posted: September 7, 2013 in Uncategorized
‘Cause lighting don’t strike the same place twice
When you and I said goodbye I felt the angels cry
‘Cause true love’s a gift, but we let it drift in a storm
Every night I feel the angels cry
C’mon babe, can’t our love be revived?
Bring it back and we gon’ make it right
I’m on the edge, just tryin’ to survive
As the angels cry
I feel my heart so pain and the pain is still there since Friday night.
I really dislike girl telling me ‘i dont know what i really want’ because chances are, they also don’t even know do they love you not.
I got hit back a deep cut and i take it as my karma lesson as what comes around goes around, i fully understood the pain already.
Guess this will be the last and final post i got to pen down in this blog about my life. So fast a month is approaching and definitely it’s a long and rough road down. And it will be the last time i read her blog, i know it’s time to really let it go with a peace of mind. I believe everything happens for a reason and cause.
I need to apologize that for the past near 3 years i cant fulfilled my role as that perfect guy for you, never near to your expectation and definitely never near to what you are looking for in a guy.
I didn’t do my part well as a boyfriend, as compared to other boyfriends I’m always never near the standard you have, or rather the benchmarking.
But for the past 3 years of being together and the 6 years of going after the same girl, I have never get tired out of her. No matter how i see her, how long i get to see her, when i see her the end result will be feeling happily deep inside my heart. Perhaps being together with her was a bad decision as i feel that if we were never together and i could still love her like how i used to then i may still be the happy guy i am today. People always ask me why i can just love her so much and do so much for her, my answer is very simple: Love her more than you love yourself. And i carry this answer with me for that 6 years.
I can say proudly, a guy who can be the boyfriend of J will be the luckiest guy on earth. She is those super sweet, loving, pretty girlfriend a guy can be proud of having. If i were to list down the things that how good she is, a million words were never enough to describe everything. She is an angel to me and changed my life, she gave me the motivation to change myself to the better. She makes me see the rainbow after every rainfall, brace me through the thunderstorm in my life, every time when i seems so low she will always be there for me. Not forgetting the amount of things she bought for me from overseas, clothes, shirts, ties, and the countless of overseas post cards i receive from her.
Even though we are together, i always had the feeling that 1 day i had to know when to let her go, letting her to go find her true Mr Right as i believe that such a good girl was never meant for me. I broke her heart, make her unhappy, make her angry, never do things to make her feel appreciated. As compared to the guys who treats her now i guess they were thousands times far better then me, be it quality or quantity. It make me realize that letting her go to find her true Mr Right is a correct decision i have made and seeing from the updates i can really convince myself that I’m correct and it’s time for me to leave her life completely so she can open her door to the guy she really wants in her life.
Memories will always be kept inside my heart, good times bad times happy times sad times, she will always be the happy cheerful sweet girl that i known. Loved her for the past 6 years, love her til today and will still be loving her no matter what happens to us, i just hope i can be the puibabe that she knew last time and not forgot about that there were once this fat guy appears in her life that once changed her life and made her happy, make her cry, make her sad, make her his everything.
1 year of rest is what i need since i already knew inside my heart that i won’t be able to fall in love with any other girl anymore or rather i cannot bring myself to love another girl as much as i love her. I need a year for a changed in my life and i guess the door of my heart will totally be shut from anyone anymore..
This is a hard lesson learned: love doesn’t mean to be with the person you love, but to see the person living happily.
To the lovely Miss J,
I do not know you will be reading this or you have already forgotten about me. But i just hope to use this little space of mine to express my gratitude and thank you for the wonderful memories we shared for the past 33 months. I know that’s much i can do for you, i know that the next guy who hold your hand will be the guy you will love deeply. I’m just simply not the guy you want in your life and not a guy you can depend on in your next phase of life. You are really a too perfect girl for me, you have done your part as a very good girlfriend and wtb. The next phase of your life journey will be a colorful journey without my existent. I wish you well in your career, in your relationship and always the cheerful sweet little adorable girl. Please forgive me of any of my wrongdoings, selfishness, foolishness or stupid mistakes that i always done to make you angry and cry. The guy who always do all these stupid things will disappear in your life for good now. Hope as time pass by, the anger you have to me will subside and wave to me when you sees me again in the future. I love you, loved you, and will still love you loving you.
And lastly let me dedicate this 1 last song for you..
That’s my face when i see myself turning into the quarter on century when the clock strikes 12 tonight.
It’s another time of this year again and i have live my life for 25 years already, sadly to say i have achieve not much things in life til now. For the next part of my life, i really hope to be able to work hard to achieve my short term and long terms goals.
Hopefully before the age of 26 next year i can achieve my ‘every-year-wishes’
Hopefully everything can goes well for me in year 2013 too. Stable job, good girlfriend, save money, change car, buy rolex 😀
Last thing for my wish: My wife to be joyce chew will love me more and even even more
but for the sake of a happier life for us, i shall endure and work hard through it.
I wanna show the world that I will be the only guy in this world who treats you the best, nothing but the best and no one can ever be as good as me in terms of pampering you.
I may not have the power to give you the best now, but in the future all the best will only be given to you
Was on the sick bed for the past 2 days due to an abnormal sudden stop and ongoing weird fever but nevertheless i receive this breakfast set on the bed from 周菲蒂 ❤
Breakfast consist of:
RAINBOW PANCAKES with lots of nice fresh berries !!!
German Sausgauge
Scramble Eggs
Movenpick blueberries yogurt
lots of hardwork waking up early in the morning to prepare it
LOVE
ITS DAMM NICE ! I swear you cant get anywhere near to this nice pancakes… unless she cooks it for you :O
The new job is so far so good and i am enjoying everyday at work although its just started a week and a day.
Basically i have to wake up at 615-630 everyday and only got to go home after 530pm~ But its fun working with the people and learning lots of new things and definitely a good career prospect its what i have search within now.
Now my primary target is to earn money and clear all debts and clear all as soon as possible and lead a new life again.. life has never been much fun if there are debts everywhere and knocking head where to find money to pay debts every month. I really hope i can be debt free before the start of 2013 ! God Bless !!!!
I like this type of TGIF night where i can relax in a corner having a glass or wine or beer and some fries under the moonlight with the river view in front of me !
I managed to drive from sengkang to airport in 18mins in a heavy traffic condition, not to boost how fast i can drive, but how much i hope to see my love one not to be late for work and eventually she did not late and was just on time. Feel happy and lots of thoughts run through my mind while i was driving alone
Love is like driving, u don’t need to have the best fantastic car, but u need a car who can reach that point in time safe and sound. I hope that though i’m not the best fantastic guy in the world, but I’m a guy trustworthy to send you to any destination you want in your life on time safe and sound.
OH I’M LIKE A LOVE SAINT MAN !
DO-TO-THING for Tomorrow 18/09/2012
BRING IN SALES, CLOSE MORE ORDERS, BRING IN MORE REVENUE
and most important thing
– Go to Chinatown before lesson starts 🙂
I have only 2 rules in loving a girl
Rule #1 : Always love her with all you have, 101% of you and always her before self.
Sad that the 3 days trip ended so fast, and now i’m sick at my bed doing nothing but coughing with a dry throat.
Apart from these, there’s 2 good news now
1) Appointment fixed on 19/9 for signing of agreement
2) Second and final interview with this big MNC company on 20/9. (It’s my dream to be able to get into a MNC !!! )
After looking for jobs this 2 months, i found out that the market isn’t that bad after all. I went for 4 interview and 3 companies asked me to confirm with them and this the last 1 allows me to go for 2nd interview.
But i really not good in rejecting company offers and i really do hope i could get into this MNC !
Let’s hope well for the signing of agreement and the final interview and hopefully they will want to employ me!!!
“If you are absent during my struggle, don’t expect to be present during my success.” – Will Smith
If you can’t go through the toughest period of my life with me, there’s no a need for you to there with me forever regardless what the future lies.
I really think that being poor its not a offense to be insulted, irregardless to anyone out there in the world because no matter how poor or how useless they are, they still have that abit of dignity and pride in their heart which no amount of money can be bought.
Reading books gives us knowledge, strengthens our power of knowledge, learning new things through reading and improve ourselves as we read those books.
Books gives me the power to feel positive after reading it, but its not always the case to be conclude how powerful your life will be just after reading a book, a good example its the “Rich Dad , Poor Dad” i read before, yes Robert Kiyosaki did teach a lot of lessons on how to be a rich guy like his rich dad, the book says his poor dad mention he cant afford it and the rich dad will only say how can i afford it and yes the rich dad lived life with great wealth, financial freedom and leads a happy life and the poor dad died of penniless and lived life full of regrets. It’s always the top selling book all over the world no matter how many years this book have been in the market. Millions of millions people bought the book and yes i do too, but out of all these so many millions, how many really does achieve a breakthrough out of it and get success like how Robert Kiyosaki is doing now. We read its because we want to learn how to have ways to earn money and how to be positive in life but can everyone really be so positive after reading the book? Especially so much negative things that happened around him, even the people are showing negative signs to him and how to expect to him to stay positive?
Oh by the way I’m selling the bird nest as shown below
Brand’s Royal Superior Bird’s Nest with Rock Sugar or Sugar Free
Outside retail price is selling @ $66.90, I’m selling @ $47 which is 30% discount of the retail price .
Besides this I’m also selling other bird nest from Brand’s and New Moon. Normal rock sugar, rock sugar with collagen and rock sugar with ginseng all also available.
Those who are interested in the bird nest can contact me through 8648 8638 alright 😉
Firstly, Happy birthday to the legend small head ling aka 小头菱, 24 years old liao must guai guai
This picture shows that both of us destined to die in Chew’s hands.. So agreed rite?
This is the place i go everyday after work, even saturday and sunday i also go to swim now 🙂 I think bedok swimming pool is the least crowded pool already see the amount of people in the pool before i went to swim.. 0 ! I’m the only one swimming in the pool and bedok pool have allocate lane 4 and 5 for swimmer like me who swim continuously so swimmer can only swim thru and fro within this lane. That’s why saturday and sun sunday swim in these 2 lanes are not crowded as compare to other lanes!
Once in a very blue blue moon.. to satisfy the craving..
TP Design School legendary chicken cutlet with salsa cheese + mushroom sauce and additional nacho cheeseeeee! Really very long time den can eat this.. but it’s really very delicious and chicken meat is not that huge portion so eat already also wont feel so fattening haha! Plus i add coleslaw because its very yum yum and eat everything into my tum tum !
When can i slim down more ? It’s been quite smooth for my intensive training for the past 1 month plus, manage to cut down around 14kg of fats in my body.. i hope to be able lose more fats and at least not in such an obese state. Suddenly got the craving of a bottle of ice cold sprite.. it’s been so long since i drink that.. i miss it! Everyday only drink plain water plain water milk milk plain water and sometimes freshly squeeze orange juice only 😦
I WANT A BOTTLE OF ICE COLD SPRITE CAN I ???
Ok it’s time for bed time, a long hard day tomorrow again.. working so hard to think when can i have a breakthrough from my current financial state.
Oh i miss this super photogenic cute lion bao ni.. with her new kitty clothes she looks damm cute ! Can’t wait to see her on friday.. The kitty dress suits so nicely on her ! Love her max!
Current addict: Maroon 5 – One more night
But baby there you again, there you again making me love you
Yeah I stopped using my head, using my head let it all go
Got you stuck on my body, on my body like a tattoo
And now i’m feeling stupid, feeling stupid crawling back to you
So I cross my heart, and I hope to die, that i’ll only stay with you one more night
And I know i’ve said it a million times
But i’ll only stay with you one more night
The more you worry, the more you feel distracted.
The more you hold on, the more the tension it will hurt you.
The more you stop it, the more it will want to move it.
The more you say, the more fault you get into.
See no evil, hear no evil, touch no evil.
Everything don’t care, everything just ignore it and life will be more peaceful. Hope my phone would be automatically off for the next 2 days, don’t feel like using phone or see any social media online.
I guess life got to be fairer, at least be more equal and treat people the same way you want people to treat you, not treat the people that you don’t wish it to treat you back and happen to you.
I want a next 2 days of silence without any communication, it will do me good
On the side note, i really don’t know how the hell the photographer took this amazing photo
Make me look so super slim that i never looked so slim before leh! Or it’s my intensive training program that good? Ha!
I shall continue to work hard to fulfill my goal~!
Ah Pui Life 